I see my friends post on tumblr and for some reason I feel so distant now.
They're my close friends--my best friends. But I'm scared to talk to them or bother them. I feel like a bystander who has no impact on their life.
I want to stop feeling this way.
My friends do not hate me and I am not a bad person. My friends love me and care about me just as I do for them.
This is really hard.
Cooking usually takes the edge off of things--but I haven't been cooking lately. Not on my diet. I have to be really strict with myself and the amount of food I eat and if I cook I'll be tempted to eat more.
Ugh I hate this
I hate being so unhappy
Darnit
I'm so scared and lonely but I think being alone will do some good for me
Yeah.....
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